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“All humans are aware of death. So we’re all a little bit sad, all the time.”

I tried to hold the tears forming in my eyes, as I heard this sentence coming from Eleanor Shellstrop’s mouth. I remembered why I loved this show so much -but I totally forgot how it made me cried every few episodes. I wouldn’t have suggest it as a Netflix pre-sleep show to Marc, if I had remember that. I’m not a fan of crying in front of people, as it turns out. Well, too late. Hooked after the fourth episode, Marc and I would end up watching more than a season during our Swiss stay. For those of you who haven’t saw The Good Place yet, I highly recommend it. It is cleverly written and although the first three episodes will probably infuriate you (some of the characters are pretty annoying) I guarantee that if you push through, it will end up being one of your favourite tv show. It’s Marc’s favourite now, and he didn’t knew about it a few days ago.

It’s our first night in Switzerland, and Marc and I are fried from all the trains and walking we had to do from the airport to the hotel. We haven’t saw each-other in years, so we have a lot to catch up on, but Marc is joining my trip for 10 days- so we also have time. After a walk around Zurich, we decide to stop at a restaurant near the hotel. We order some very fucking expansive food, thinking that we chose an overly fancy restaurant by mistake -we will later realize that everything from McDonalds to risotto is trying to ruin you, here. We pass the evening talking about how we lived through Covid, since we haven’t seen each-other since. Marc told me that he had a rough patch during this time, as he just had bought an apartment when Covid hit and he was afraid to lose his job and not being able to pay his bills. When vfx studios started lay-offing people, he got increasingly anxious. Fortunately enough, he only ended up with a small salary-cut and was able to pay everything he needed to pay, to survive without problems. It did take a toll on his mental health, though, as it did for a lot of us. Marc struggled for a while with social anxiety, after the pandemic, and he confessed still feeling uncomfortable in restaurants or busy environments. Now discussing that very topic, I could sense a panic attack growing within him, so I decided to also share some anxiety problems I had during the pandemic. I wanted to make him focus on something else. Although not social, my anxiety did fucked with my head for a while, and I could see Marc was trapped in the same “loop” I was trapped in months ago. What was my anxiety? Well let me tell you a ridiculous story.

For a reason I cannot comprehend (it’s probably age, but I refuse to admit it), I got very sick on my 30th birthday from taking a sip of the lake (by accident, of course) near the cottage we were partying at. This lovely event triggered something called IBS (which is basically getting randomly sick from eating some aliments you were very fine eating before). This is very hard to diagnose, although 15% of the world population have it. You can control it easily by not eating these things or taking medication before eating it -but while you are trying to diagnose this, you obviously continue to eat those triggers, without knowing, which makes you sick randomly (or so you think). That brings me to my story. While on a date, during covid, I was walking outside with my partner when I suddenly started to feel very sick (due to one thing I had ate a few hours before). That would have been fine in any other circumstances, but it was Covid, so there was absolutely nothing open. No shops, no coffee places, nothing. I had to hide in a back-alley of Mont-Royal (and lie to my partner because I was too ashamed to tell the truth) to do what I had to do. This was an awful moment, obviously, and I deeply wished to never experience something similar ever again. My ego is probably still in this back alley, to this day. After the event, I got anxious every time I was going out of the house, scared that I would end up suddenly sick in a place where no toilet would be accessible. Anxiety doing what it does best, I did end up having belly aches often, tumbling in a loop that lasted the whole covid. I was anxious to get sick - that made me feel sick - i gave reason to that anxiety of being afraid to get sick. Lovely. I finally managed to get out of the loop, by doing some meditation and forcing myself in some of these scary situations. During my trip around the world, there was some moments (like being 6 hours in a bus that didn’t had any bathrooms) that did threw me back on the anxious side -but as it turned out, I was able to control my dumb thoughts and my body ended up being always on my side. Nothing bad ever happened. And to be fair, I think it’s because my whole mindset changed. I realized that no ones give a shit. If I had to be sick, regardless where and why, no one would ever laugh at it. Imagine someone getting sick next to you on the bus. What do you do ? Probably try to help by giving him some of the medication you have in your bag. Or asking the bus driver to stop to help the person. Certainly not laugh and judge that person for being, well, a person. “I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put, we are not in this alone.” The moment I realized that my worst scenario was never going to happen (the bus wouldn’t turn, point at me and laugh at my misery), my anxiety suddenly stopped and my belly aches vanished. For weeks, in all of these situations, I started to think that if I had to get sick, I would get sick and people would help and it would be over after -and that is it. Impermanence. It wouldn’t define me, it wouldn’t make me ridiculous, it would just be something that happened. And then, I just stopped thinking about it, all in all. These situations that once triggered my anxiety became just any other normal situations. I was out of my anxiety loop. Marc felt better, just by me sharing this with him. He felt less alone. I also did. And it confirmed to me that we are all the same. We all have some anxieties or ridiculous fears, and if we were all able to discuss it without being afraid to get judge, most of them would probably go away instantly. We ended up staying another hour in the restaurant, just chatting -a big fuck you to Marc’s anxiety loop. We walked back to the hotel and I asked him if he had watched The Good Place. I do not know why, but this whole anxiety discussion made me think of how the show tackles some very delicate philosophical and psychological topics. He didn’t watch it, so we decided that this will be our pre-bed ritual for the upcoming days. We watched a few episodes that night, before falling asleep.

We woke up early the next day, ready for a tour of Zurich and of the Lindt Chocolate Factory. It was super rainy, so we were glad that our tour was in a bus. It lasted about 2 hours -including two small walks in different neighbourhoods and one boat ride to the chocolate museum. The Lindt house made me feel like I was in Charlie and the chocolate factory. It was absolutely magical (and there was no limits of the amount of chocolate you could eat, for free). I ended up eating so much that I had a headache for several hours, but man it was worth it. We took the bus to get back in town and had to switch to go to Luzern. There, we chilled for the rest of the night -it was so cold and wet outside that we ended up feeling super tired of our day.

We woke up the next morning, had breakfast and walked around Luzern all day. It was very rainy and cold, but we ended up walking to a breath-taking spot that was overseeing the whole town and lake. We stayed there for about an hour, talking about everything, before going back down and chilling in the hotel for the evening.

The next morning, we took the train to Interlaken, settled in our hotel and decided to walk around to discover the village. We ended up alone, on top of an abandoned castle, about 45min walk from the city centre. There, we had some conversations about how crazy life is. If someone had told us, 10 years ago when we met, that we would one day be on top of a castle in ruins, in Switzerland, we would have called insanity. How could anyone predict something like that? We knew we would be friends for life, since the first day we met at work. But never we could have predict that Marc would now be living in London -waiting for his permanent residency, and that I would be doing a solo round the world (I use to hate being alone). We laughed about the whole situation and tried to imagine where we could be 10 years from now. The answer ended up being: anywhere and anything. That’s how crazy life is. One single action, one decision, can change everything. Isn’t it beautiful. We walked back to town, had dinner and went for another walk before crashing in front of The Good Place and falling asleep.

The next morning, we took the bus to Grinderwald -a village with a villain sounding name. There, we took the cable car and train to Jungfraujoch -the top of Europe. It was motherfucking freezing on top, and we even had a snowstorm while going up the cable car, but we were lucky enough to get a short-window of time without clouds obstructing the view. There was mountain peaks, covered in a thick layer of white snow, as far as we could see. It was absolutely stunning. After 15 minutes on top, the storm caught up to us and the view disappeared in the clouds. It was super windy and very cold, so we decided to go back inside and see what else the mountains had to offer. We ended up walking in the ice palace and eating a sandwich at the restaurant. We went down with another train, that passed through a beautiful village called Lauterbrunnen. We felt in love with it instantly, and decided to come back the next day to hike around. We arrived back in Interlaken around 6PM, walked back to the hotel and cooked a pizza for dinner. We passed the night watching The Good Place and chatting about it.

We woke up around 8h30 AM the next day, had breakfast and chilled while I was doing my laundry. When it was done, we took the train to Lauterbrunnen and started to hike in the valley. It was one of the most gorgeous town I ever saw in my life. We walked around for about two hours, during which I realized that I was getting a bit annoyed at Marc, here and there. I do not think it was his fault at all -I just realized that I hadn’t been alone in several weeks now, and I wasn’t used to it anymore. I don’t know if I grew into a loner during this trip, but I felt trapped and like I wasn’t able to breathe. Of course, this feeling was absolutely unfair to Marc, so I tried my best to hide it. I was so happy to see him, it had been way too long since the last time -and he was as funny and nice as I remembered. This wasn’t about him, really. I think it was just my brain not adjusting well to having been 5 months alone and then, without transition, being with people for three weeks in a row, 24/7. I took a deep breath and tried to changed my thoughts as we were doing a stop in a coffee shop, at the end of our walk back. We sat outside. The temperature was still gloomy, but it wasn’t very cold anymore. We took about an hour to just relax there. At some point, a guy and a girl walked by the coffee shop. The guy looked at me, without the girl noticing, and smiled when my eyes crossed his. I didn’t make anything of it, until I went back inside to pee and ran straight into the guy that was going out of the bathroom. So I don’t know if you can also tell when someone is flirting with you without telling you anything, but I swear this guy was french kissing me with his eyes. It made me smile -flirt is always good for the ego. I peed, went back outside and started to put back my jacket (we were leaving) and realized that the guy and the girl were sitting just behind me (but inside). He was now starring at me through the window. I looked back at him, before leaving with Marc towards the train. I hope that girl wasn’t his girlfriend because I swear to god this was some squinty eyes and flirty smiles every time we glanced at eachother’s. Marc didn’t noticed anything, though, so maybe the girl was also clueless. We took the train back to Interlaken and while I was watching the raindrops dancing on the window, my thoughts brought me back to Morocco. I snapped back to Switzerland, about 20 minutes later, when we arrived at the station.

The next morning, we had to take another train in direction of Bern. At the moment we put feet in the city, we both knew it would be our favourite. I am not sure what it is about Bern, but the vibe here was incredible. The layout of the town is also very nice, and very accessible. We walked to our hotel, checked-in and then I decided to let Marc know that I needed some alone time. I didn’t want him to feel bad or attacked -I just knew I needed some time to write and to sort some things out about my return to Montreal, so I asked him if it was ok if I went into a coffee shop to do all of that. He agreed and we separated for the afternoon. This actually helped my mood a ton. I definitely needed that alone time, and although I ended up not writing at all, it gave me time to buy all my furniture for the new apartment I had just signed for my return to Montreal in May. I stayed about 4 hours in the coffee shop before meeting back Marc at the hotel. We went to pickup some food and came back to eat it in the room. We talked about our day, while dinning, and then started talking about how crazy 2020 was. We tried to remember all the major events that happened that year, and we ended up discussing the fact that the US government said UFO existed and no one gave a fuck. We had a laugh about it (both Marc and I are science people, so we know that’s not literally what the US government said) but the topic was still something interesting to discuss. I ended up sharing with him an article about Tom Delonge (the former Blink-182 singer) that was to thank for, for the release of all these documents about unidentified floating objects. Tom started a school named ‘To the stars’, a while back, and it is because of his researches and talks with some high ranked people at the government that he ended up learning about these tapes and documents. The conversation was very interesting but we ended up falling asleep on it.

The next day, we had breakfast and walked to a viewpoint on the other side of the bridge. The view was magnificent. This city was truly an amazing place to be. We walked back to town and decided to go to a museum and former house of Albert Einstein. This was very small but an interesting exhibit. After, we decided to split again -Marc wanted to do more museums and I am not a fan of that. I will always choose walking outside or chilling in coffee shops over this -unless the museums is really something unique. I walked back to the same coffee shop I was at the day before, and was received with a lot of smiles and talks. The owner was very happy to see me again -a good sign that I loved the place, she said. We talked about an hour together, of her and of my trip. Then, one of the barista came to talk with me about my next destination and a client, who overheard the conversation, also came and sat with me to discuss my next city (he went a few weeks back and had some recommendations). All of them were lovely people and I had a very great time talking with them. After about an hour, I was alone and decided to work a bit on my blog. I stayed two more hours and finally had to go back to the hotel to meet Marc for dinner. The owner warmly said her goodbyes and gave me a postcard so I could send it back to her from somewhere else in the world. I walked back up to the centre and met Marc in the hotel. We decided to go grab some sushi for our last night together. It ended up hurting my stomach, for a weird reason (the reason is probably : never eat sushi in the middle of the alps.. the ocean is too far for it to be fresh), so we ended up talking all night because I couldn’t fall asleep. We chatted about our friendship, about our families and the future. I ended up falling asleep, happy to have had Marc by my side for the past week.

We woke up with a bit of a sadness in both our hearts. We knew this was good bye day, and although I was excited for what was coming next, I was also sad to see Marc going. With him living in London and me in Montreal -I knew we wouldn’t see each other for another while. We had breakfast and then walked to the train station, where we said our goodbyes about three times. I hopped on my train in direction of Neuchatel, thinking about all the deep conversations Marc and I ended up having over the week. The main thing that was coming back to my thoughts, in a loop, was that we should stop being so afraid of judgement all the time. We ALL have a past that is somewhat messy. We all have anxieties, fears and sometimes irrational thoughts. No one is going to judge us if we take the time to explain what we live through. We really all need to take the time to understand that. Everyone. Is. The. Same. So yeah… take is sleazy.


I arrived in Neuchâtel late afternoon. I checked in and passed my day walking around town, slowly getting back to my solo traveller pace. As it was now Sunday, everything was closed, or most of everything. It was rainy and cold, and I was exhausted. I stopped in a crêperie, to get some forces back. It worked long enough for me to walk around the castle, but the cold and humid weather caught up to me pretty fast. The city was fine but, after bern, nothing to be impressed by. I felt asleep early, eager to discover another town the next day.


I took the train in direction of Montreux, early in the morning. When I arrived, I was instantly charmed by this beautiful town boarding the lake. I checked in and decided to walk to the Chillon castle, about 40 minutes away. The view was beautiful during my walk, but I was even more stunned by my tour of the castle. After about an hour and a half, I decided to walk back to the city center, following a path alongside the lake. We could finally feel spring coming, as the flowers around were all fully blooming. After my walk, I stopped in a coffee for a while. I always feel like coffee shops are the soul of a town. I stayed there a few hours, before walking back to my hotel -with a stop at a cute restaurant nearby. The sky was slowly turning to gold and I noticed a viewpoint, next to the church on the mountain. I walked to it, sat on a rock and watched the sunset, feeling peaceful, and in love with this beautiful and calm city. I went back to the hotel with the sun now below the horizon, the cold slowly taking to my bones. Felt asleep after a long hot shower that didn’t manage to heat me back completely. I wokeup the next morning and took the train in direction of a new city. A city that would end up being the highlight of my trip to Switzerland.


With every train station passing by, the landscape became more and more impressive. The valleys and lakes turned into mountains with snow peaks merging with the clouds. You could almost hear the sound of the waterfalls, crashing down to meet the crystal clear rivers where they would go to die. I was staying for three nights in this area, and something inside of me already knew that it was going to be magical. The train stopped at Zermatt’s station, about 3 hours after the beginning of my journey. 

The air was crisp and it was very windy, but the enchanting town was leaving me only with a feeling of warmth. I walked through the main street, to reach my hotel that was near the church, in the centre. It almost felt like I was walking in a gingerbread house’s village. The small cottages, mostly made of wood, were charmingly crooked and all compacted next to another. It smelled like brewed coffee infused with the freshness of a morning, just after a snowstorm. I checked in my hotel and decided to use the great weather to climb up to the Matterhorn. This iconic mountain was already visible from downtown, gracing me by it’s splendour. It was about an hour thirty of cable-cars to arrive to the top, and the whole journey was getting colder by the minute. The view was gorgeous, though. The greenery around slowly switching to an infinite white desert, covered with melting glaciers that were tragically reminding us what the future was holding. I stayed about two hours on the top, admiring the view and eating some Switzerland delicacies. Another hour and an half later, I was back in the small town, below. I was starting to get hungry, so I decided to walk around in search of the perfect spot. On the same street of my hotel, I passed in front of a lovely restaurant (I first thought it was an Inn) that was promising a cozy atmosphere with it’s fireplace taunting me from inside. I was about to enter when I saw a sign saying it wasn’t open before 18H30. It was 17H30, and I was damn hungry, so I decided to continue walking in search of another place. I walked about thirty minutes, not finding anything that was feeling as perfect as that first location, so I decided to go back and wait that it opens. I sat on the flat top of a rock wall, people-watching, in the meantime. When the clock turned 18H30, I walked inside. There was something cinematographic about entering this place, like the switch of a whole set happening between the lobby and the door. The cold blue light of outside giving place to the cosy ambiance of inside, a darker yet warmer atmosphere. And then, you appeared.

Tall, handsome, looking at me with your bright blue eyes, passing your hand though your blond hair. You greeted me, showing me where to go to remove my seventeen layers of clothes. You were witty and sassy, and you made me laugh with your comments on how overdressed I was. You sat me at a table, next to the fire. I texted Rali that I chose the restaurant wisely: the staff was incredibly appealing. I studied you, while you went back to work. You looked polish, professional -yet I could see a chest tattoo poking up from your shirt collar and two small piercings (one on your nose, one on the tragus of your ear) revealing an interesting side of your person. You intrigued me. And I thought you were so damn hot. I tried to make eye contact, but you gave me nothing back. You didn’t even came to take my order -someone else did. I noticed two other guys, the cook and someone with longer hair, watching me from their stations. But you, you were just working without even glancing at my table. Maybe you weren’t intrigued as much as I was. But then, you came with my order and I couldn’t resist to make my interest more obvious to you. You gave me my plate. I looked straight in your eyes an said “beautiful”. I am pretty sure you knew I wasn’t speaking about the steak. You came back once, to ask if everything was good. And then once more, to make a witty comment, again. I thought to myself that I couldn’t leave without asking your number. Came the time to pay and put my clothes back on, and you appeared in the room and asked me some questions. I asked you back. You were from Germany, but established here, in Zermatt. I knew this was the perfect time to ask. At that moment, I was pretty sure there was an interest from your side too. I put my last layer on and was about to dare, but I saw you glance at the door, to see if some new clients were coming in -and I don’t know why, it made me froze. I didn’t want to put you in an awkward situation. What if I misinterpreted and just projected my interest. What if you were just plain professional right now. “I am only here for one night. Is there any place I can go to meet people?” That’s absolutely NOT what I wanted to say. But hep, I said it anyway. You suggested one street, not too far, and then I thanked you and I left. 

I was walking on the street, and for the five minutes from your restaurant to my hotel, I kept thinking that I was going to regret this. Why didn’t I ask your number. Why did I froze, that’s so stupid. Fuck that. I am going back. I am going to walk back in this restaurant, look you straight in the eyes and tell you that if this trip has thought me something, it’s that if you don’t take the risk, you loose the chance -so I’m taking it. I was almost to my hotel when I decided to walk back. I rehearsed my speech, on the way to your restaurant, but as I got closer and closer, the confidence started to give more space to the stress. I spotted a club, on the corner of the street just before, and decided to enter for a shot of liquid courage. 

There was loud music reaching the street, and an outside bar on a kind-of veranda -the perfect place to order quickly before going back to my mission. “One glass of rhum and coke, please”. I wanted to order a shot, but my mouth asked for something slower to drink -to push away the dreadful moment a bit more. Once I got the glass, I spotted a group of people and decided to ask if I could joined them. Everything to change my mind of what I was about to do next. The group took me in, warmly. There were two brothers, from Catalonia, two girls (one was Swiss -the girlfriend of one of the brother, the other one was from Czechia) and two other guys that I was going to end up knowing more, later on. I stayed outside with them, drinking somewhat slowly and getting to know them all with some witty comments. They made me feel relaxed again, so that was a win. After about thirty minutes, one of the girl told me she was looking for a nice place for them to have dinner tonight -it was one of the brothers mom’s birthday. Instantly, you reappeared in my thoughts. “So I went for dinner in that lovely place, earlier. I was about to go back to ask this very hot manager for his phone number, maybe you can join and you can ask the staff if there would be availability for your group later?”, I said.  “Girl, i fucking love this. Let’s go”. She was now even more excited than I was stressed, but weirdly it made me feel better to have someone there with me. We walked back in your restaurant. You weren’t there. “Hm, Hello?” I turned back. It was you. Looking damn confused by me being back. Fuck. Now I am wondering why I came back. To be fair your reaction made sense, I too would be quite shocked. Specifically after almost an hour since I left. “I am bringing you clients, lol” And here we go, I froze again. That helpful girl took over, now asking you if you had place for them later on. You both had a whole conversation while I was just standing there, in complete silence -literally as frozen as the mountains outside. The girl was done. You both looked at me. She damn knew I was supposed to ask you out. But she also saw that this wasn’t going to happen. She grabbed my arm, we said bye, we left the place. “Wtf, girl. I thought you wanted to ask him out”. “I did but have you seen him. Tall, handsome, tattooed, with an attitude -that’s my kryptonite, I don’t know what to tell you.” She laughed. I did too, but deep down I already regretted. And there was no coming back a third time. I called defeat, for that night, at least. Maybe I could go back tomorrow, I was going to sleep on that, later. But right now, I was going back to the bar with my new crew. And I was going to drink a bit more to forget my absolute cowardliness.

We moved the party inside the bar. Shots and drinks were coming, from everywhere. There was a band playing on a small stage and we danced for hours, drinking and laughing.  At some point, the guy with the dreads kissed me, while I was waiting for my drink at the bar. It wasn’t his fault, but I had no interest whatsoever. I still had you in my mind. One of the girl looked angry, or maybe sad. I realized that she was into him. The perfect escape from that situation. I tried to make her tell him how she felt. She didn’t want to, but she admitted. They were now about to leave for the restaurant. Your restaurant. They wanted me to come, but I didn’t wanted to go. The two other guys (not the brothers) didn’t want to go either. I tagged along with them, was about to say bye to go in my hotel but I had lost my room card. I needed to pee badly, so we all ended up in the champagne bar, at the end of the road. I decided to stay for a drink, after I had peed (and found back my card). We talked for about two hours, about that same girl that looked angry earlier. Turned out that one of the guy was actually really into her. They had kissed a few days ago, and he didn’t knew she was into the guy with dreads. Drama alert. After two more drinks, I was starting to get more than tipsy and also kind of tired. The second guy, Michel, was flirting with me and I wasn’t closed to the idea. But you were still in my mind, no one matching the feeling I had when I saw you. Michel and I ended up kissing, but then i asked them to walk me back home and I went back to my room, alone -even though Michel wanted to come up. In another situation, it could have certainly happened. I had a hot shower, drank a shit-ton of water (to prevent the coming hangover) and felt asleep quickly.

The next morning, I woke up with the idea to find you online. I am writing this article as the writers from YOU season 1, because that’s how I felt by trying to search you on facebook. I didn’t even knew your name. My search wasn’t successful, obvisouly. A very short stalker career. I laughed, closed facebook and told myself that I would have to take my courage and come to your restaurant again, tonight. Or just do nothing, and move on. But then, my phone buzzed with a Tinder alert. I opened the app, and there you were. The first card. As fucking hot in your pictures as in my memories. Your name was Christian. I froze, yet again. Kinda surprised by how life was being so helpful right now. I swapped right. It’s a match. I would like to apologize to the tinder gods for always talking shit about this app: you just helped a homie that missed her chance, twice. Thank. You. Tinder. “Damn it, I should have def ask for your number before leaving that restaurant”, I wrote. “I told you I was only here one night, but I’m staying in St-Niklaus for two more (which I have just learned is very near). Do you want to hangout?”. I looked again at your profile. It says you like travel, board sports and wine. You are 31 and you’re a Libra. I never believed in astrology, but I must confess it feels like all the planets have aligned on this one.

I went out for a walk. I wanted to explore the town, while it was still clear outside. I also had to switch hotel to go to St-Niklaus, but as my new crew had told me the night before, I needed to reconsider because there was nothing to do over there. I would prob end up needing to take the train back to Zermatt every morning, to enjoy the town and the mountains around. “Morning. I should have asked for your’s tho”. It’s you. “I had a big night before and was like damn, I’m def not going out tonight. But yes, I’d like to hangout”. Have I thank Tinder, already? I think it deserves another gratitude comment. I asked your social, so we can continue speaking there -and make an arrangement. You were already at work, but we chatted a while and you gave me some recommendations of what to do for the day. We made the plan to recontact each-other tonight, after your work -we would see each-other if you weren’t too tired by then. I decided to cancel my nights in St-Niklaus and stay in Zermatt instead. I went out to Sunnegga, the peak of a mountain you recommended to me, had lunch and worked a bit on my blog. Went back down, ate a delicious meal in an Italian restaurant, walked around town and made my way back to my new hotel. I finished watching the last season of YOU (very disappointing) and then looked at the time. It was almost 23H. I had a feeling that you would probably be too tired to meet tonight, but I still asked. “Hey pretty boy, how’s the long work day going?” You replied that you were going to be done around midnight, but you were feeling sick and tired so you were going to go straight home. We could meet the next morning, for coffee or lunch. I texted Rali, who by now knew everything about the story. She texted back: “No way. This guy can sleep tomorrow”. It made me laugh. She was right. We didn’t go through all of this for nothing. I wrote you back. “Well, that’s a shame. Would have loved catching up in a more private setup. I’m only here for two nights, so thats your call *insert evil emoji*”. Rali got the details, in live, getting me even more excited with every turn of events. “So what do you propose?”, you asked. “Well, we almost missed the opportunity, twice. I say we meet tonight and you sleep tomorrow”. I knew I was making it hard to resist. That was the point. “You are right. Sleeping is for the dead. Where are you right now?”. I gave you my address. You told me you were going to stop at your place, to take a shower, then take a taxi to come over -with a bottle of wine. I couldn’t believe I made you change your mind and as I realized that you were actually coming here, my whole femme fatale act dropped to give place to panic. “Rali, I froze twice in front of this guy. I’m a bit stressed”. “Imagine him. He’s probably gonna cut his balls trying to shave them too fast. You chase or you don’t. Assume your role. You got this”. I swear this girl is my soulmate. She made me laugh and brought back my confidence with one single text. “I’m here”. It’s him. Fuck. Okay, I got this.

I go down the stairs, walk to the entrance door and unlock it. And there you are. Damn, you are beautiful. I let you in. We hug. The kind of hug that promise a night of great sex. “Hi, stranger”, I say, laughing. “Hey, I’m Christian”. “I’m Steph, nice to meet you”. We go up with the elevator, I unlock the room and let you in. The lights are dimmed, music is playing -I made my homework. You sit on a chair, while I sit on the bottom of the bed, close enough to be able to touch you, later on. You open the wine bottle and pour some in each glass. We cheers, visibly both of us are nervous. We start drinking and talking. I already told you that I was about to come back to your restaurant to get your number, now, you are telling me how you lived through the same story. You tell me that every guy in the restaurant thought I was hot. One of them even went up from his usual station, a few times. You asked him why he was up so often, but you knew the answer. I laughed. I tell you that I had noticed them, and that it was flattering. You tell me that you also thought I was hot, but you were shy. You are, sometimes. So you made extra effort not to look at me. I laugh. I tell you that because you gave me nothing, I thought you weren’t interested and I got nervous about asking your number. You tell me that you were surprised, when I came back the second time. You wondered if now, you should have asked my number. You were about to, but that girl pulled me out of the restaurant. We both laugh. And then, you lean towards me. We kiss. A kiss that makes all my body shiver. A throwback to my teenage years -butterflies in my belly, my heart skipping a beat. I can tell you, that’s the best kiss I had in ages. Usually, and based on my round the world analysis, first kisses kinda suck. People are too fast, too intense, too much tongue right away -like they don’t take the time to just know your face for 5 seconds, before jumping full on. But you. You are perfect. Your kisses are sensual, slowly increasing in passion and it drives me crazy. I just want to jump on you right now. But I know the game, so I gently push you away. We continue talking. We talk about some of our accidents, about travels we made, plans we have for the future. Every other subject, we stop to kiss again, and it’s more and more hard to resist. I think all travellers would agree that a limited time frame intensifies things. “What sign are you?”, you ask. “Oh no. I liked you”, I laugh. “I don’t believe in astrology. Do you?”. You tell me no, but I tease you about it, because you just asked for my sign. You tell me you are a Libra, and it makes you someone focus on balance. I might not believe in astrology, but that’s a good information to have. I do believe that having balance in life is the most important thing. I ask you about my sign, not because I believe my birth month can define my whole personality, but because I want to know what you think of me. You aren’t falling for it. And we are done on wine, so you stand from the chair and come sit on the bed, next to me. I can feel my heart racing, it’s going so fast that it would prob win against Paul Walker. We start kissing again, pulling each-other closer and closer. There is no way to tell how cold it is outside, but this room is getting increasingly hotter. There is something electrical about us, together. It just fit, perfectly, from the kisses to the touches, to having you inside me. I am not sure where the time is going, but after the fourth time of us having sex, I catch a glimpse at it and it’s now 4AM. We try to calm down, in between each session, but the attraction we have for each-other makes it impossible. We end up talking, laying in each-others arms, your hand stroking me and mine playing with your hair. This whole thing is perfect. From beginning to end. The almost missed opportunity, the fitting personalities, the amazing sex and the romantic night cuddling, after. You are my hallmark movie, except that the end isn’t going to be that perfect love story. You are here and I am not meant to be. I am just passing through. But tonight, this is not important. Tonight I want to live this romantic fairy tale, as if it was going to end with an happy forever and after. I want to be in the present moment and act as if you are the one, because tonight -you are. We both know this relationship is finite, so we both give ourselves to it completely. There is something sad about this whole encounter, but I cannot feel anything but gratitude and peace. I fall asleep in your arms, with a smile on my face.

We wakeup around 11AM, still in each-others arms. We start kissing, and instantly that electricity comes back. I swear to god, if I had found you in Montreal, I would never let you go. It feels like we know each-other since forever, like this doesn’t feel like a one night. It’s almost weird to think about the fact it is. We make love one last time, and then we stay for another hour, cuddling and talking about everything. There’s a part of me that is happy to leave. You are danger. I know I would fall for you, if we would be dating on a longer period. I need to go. I stand and starts dressing up. “I am hungry”. It takes us another hour to get ready, because we keep kissing and hugging and just slowing the time down so we could stay together, longer. But you work in a few hours. And I really need to push you away right now. I need to remind myself that this is a perfect chapter, but nothing more. We walk to the busy street, where all the restaurants are. You were about to leave but you change your mind, you are going with me. We sit outside. The air is cold, but the sun is warming us. “Are you okay?”, you ask. “Yes. I am enjoying the present moment”, I answer. Maybe I look sad. I am not, really. Well, maybe a tiny bit. We all know by now that I am an eternal helpless romantic. This night. You. This was absolutely perfect. This is, absolutely perfect. A part of me is sad that this is about to end. I am dreaming of this perfect love story, where I finally find my person. And our story has nothing to envy the ones from movies:  A rich workaholic girl goes to a small ski-resort town in the Swiss Alps. She meet an handsome restaurant/Inn manager. They almost miss their chance, twice. Then by some sort of miracle, still manage to meet and deeply fall in love. Well, that last part is what the movies are. The cruel reality is that there is no time for us to fall. There is just enough for us to wonder. So, I chose to be grateful instead. I chose to appreciate this moment and to thank life for that perfect chapter. You stand up and go inside, to the bathroom. You come back a few minutes later, and you kiss me. Why are you so damn perfect. “I paid. Let’s go”. A gentlemen, until the last minute. We walk up to the middle of the street. I thank you. We kiss. We hug, a longer one. A goodbye one. We kiss one last time, before parting ways. I walk back to my hotel, feeling contented. I truly thank life for this awesome episode. You were perfect, from beginning to end, and this is going to be a memory I will keep forever. Who knows, when I am an old lady, i’ll maybe be telling the tale of that perfect german boy I once met, in the Swiss Alps, during my round the world.

I walk back to the hotel for a quick nap, before going back out to take a train to Gornergrat. I pass my afternoon on the top of this glacier, just taking the time to process everything. This city was truly magical. After a few hours, I go back down and almost fall asleep in the train. I stop to eat a cheese fondue in that same restaurant we had lunch at, and then I walked to my hotel and fall asleep, almost instantly.

I wakeup to several texts from you -you sent them around midnight, when you got back home from work. You were starting to get sick, before joining me the night before, and it hadn’t gone better since. You ask me when I am leaving. I answer that my train leaves at 12h40. I invite you to meet me before, if you are awake -but I know you aren’t. I know we will miss each-other. I go out, to the train, and there is a gentle snow storm outside. I smile. Couldn’t it be more magical? I fantasize about you meeting me at the train station, us kissing goodbye under the snowflakes, the perfect picture. But I know, this isn’t going to happen. And that doesn’t make this whole encounter less than perfect. I stop at a coffee shop. I have lunch there and then I hop on my train. I leave Zermatt with feelings all over the place. But mainly, I leave it grateful and satisfied. I met many kings, during this round the world, but it was the most beautiful story I have lived -so far. And you are to thank for.


My train arrived in Geneva, several hours later. It was rainy outside, but I only had to walk about 5 minutes to get to my hotel. I checked in and then went outside in search of a dinner. I had pasta in a restaurant and went back in my hotel to finalize some plans for my two last destinations. I felt asleep to a text from you, telling me you hoped you had felt better last night so we could have had another night together. I melted. I tell you I am grateful we met and that I will forever keep this glimpse of a finite fairy-tale, as a perfect memory.

I wake up around 5AM because someone is legit playing bowling in the room above. I try to go back to sleep, without success. At about 8 AM, the other neighbour is talking on his phone so loudly that I first thought he was speaking to me. I wakeup, pack my bags, drop them at the lobby and go out for a coffee. I pass my afternoon Skyping my parents and writing this blog. I am taking a flight to my 13th destination, in a few hours, and I am excited to see what this is going to bring to my travel story. The end of this adventure is getting dangerously closer, and I have not yet to comprehend how I feel about it.

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