Be my valentine -or a tech bro disaster.

A day before flying to Nevada for a two-weeks roadtrip, I ran into a guy from 'Griffintown-tech,' a Facebook group of tech people from my neighborhood. The special thing about this encounter is that I already knew who he was. A few months earlier, Rali was playing with my Tinder and saw him liking my profile. She tried to make me like him back. I didn’t, though—because I didn’t find him attractive at all. But granted, for Rali, he was the only one with a profile that was somewhat interesting—and now that I was standing in front of him, he was actually kinda charming.

He recognized me and invited me to grab a coffee, which I declined because I still had lots to prepare before my trip. I told him to reach out to me when I would be back in November.

A month later, we once again ran into each other. He told me he was thinking about me that same day and invited me for that long past-due coffee. We met up at Le Petit Dep the next day.

He arrived and started talking straight away about work, asking me tons of questions about my company and position—and dropping here and there that he was looking for a new job. I tried to change the subject a few times until he dropped a “Well, it’s been an hour, I'm gonna have to go, my girlfriend is waiting for me at home.” That motherfucker. Half laughing at myself for misinterpreting the meet-up and half angry that this wanna-be tech bro felt entitled enough to force me to host an interview on a Sunday—I smiled and started to put my jacket on.

“Oh, I didn’t mean now. But like, I have to go soon.”

I continued to bundle up while telling him we weren’t recruiting and that I had things to do. He then brought back the subject of his girlfriend.

“We met while you were on your trip,” he said.

"Wait, what? And you already live together?” I asked, discerning more and more red flags.

“Well, you know what it is, we are in our thirties, we have no time to lose.”

I was looking at him in disbelief. I thought this was incredibly dumb, and my face probably spoke it aloud.

“I mean, I knew her from before. We used to go to school together.”

"Aaah. That makes more sense. I wished you the best, and—” He interjects.

“We are going to Mexico together for Christmas, but I don’t even know if I will be with her still by then.”

Okay, now this is getting to a place I don’t want it to go. What in the hell is he thinking about? Securing a job AND a potential plan B for when he broke up with his partner?

“That’s a very dick thing to say. You give her enough hope to move in together and plan a trip in a month—but you are already talking about it not working?”

He laughed, like I just made the best joke ever. This whole encounter is a fucking disaster. We finally get out of the café and part ways, just after he asks me to call him back if ever we start recruiting. The audacity, y’all.

“I won’t.” His smile disappears, and he walks away. I walk back to my flat, whispering aloud “WTF” a few times on the way.

This could have just stayed like this. But four months later, I shit you not, he decided it was appropriate to send me a DM saying he was back.

“Back from where? Anyway, we still aren’t recruiting,” I wrote back.

“Back from boyfriend land. Remember you told me to call you back when I turned single.”

Excuse the fuck out of me? In what fucking world would I have said to an average-looking man pressuring me to host an interview on a fucking Sunday to call me back when he turned single? I was flabbergasted by the audacity. But then, I REALIZED THE DATE. It was Valentine’s Day!! Guys, I can’t. Did he just assume girls are desperate enough for this shit to work?

“I’m not looking for work, but I am available for recruitment in other ways. Also, sorry for last time if I came off as rude, I really had the wrong idea about that meetup.”

I sat there, staring at my screen, trying to process what level of self-delusion this man had reached.

I replied that I never told him to reach back, specifically since that catchup turned out to be an interview. I said I was not interested and that we clearly didn’t recalled the same event. He wrote back something but I deleted it without checking. Some things just don’t deserve energy.